Death and Reflection

Last week, in a space of 24 hours, I was notified of four people that had passed away.

One of them was Steve Jobs, former CEO of Apple Inc and someone whom although I had never met or knew, seemed to spark a wave of mourning across the world. His innovative mind changed the world, so too his thought leadership and approach on running of a global brand and company. My ex boyfriend is a big Apple fan, and although it took me a while to switch, I now prefer Apple products too.

Another recent death was a former nanny of mine, aged 91, whom even though it was over 20 years ago that she looked after my brother and I, and whom I didn’t really like, I often thought of where she had ended up. My strangest memory of her was when she would run after me around the house waving a tea towel!

The third person was the daughter of a friend of my mother. She was in her early 20s and had Cystic Fibrosis. I had met her when I was younger. My mother was deeply saddened by this passing, and so it had an effect on me too. This friend of hers she knows from school days.

The fourth person, and the one that had the most impact on me was a girl, now married for a couple of years by the name of Ilana. She was two years ahead of me at school, and was 34 at passing. She died of tongue cancer. How sad. She lost her father about a year ago; and my thoughts go out to her sister and other members of her family too.

Ilana was always full of life and even though I don’t think I’d seen her for maybe a decade, I remember chatting to her in school, and was good friends with her cousin.

From what I hear, the funeral parlour was full to the brim, and scores of people were huddled outside trying to hear the ceremony’s proceedings. The prayers that evening were also packed to the rafters.

Furthermore, last Friday/Saturday was Yom Kippur or the Day of Atonement. It’s the holiest day in the Jewish religion and is when your fate for the next 12 months is determined (so they say). During prayers, the memorial prayer “Yizkor” is said – for immediate relatives who are no longer alive, and to remember those who have fallen that have no one to remember them (eg Holocaust victims).

In the month leading up to this day, you are meant to have repented for your sins, asked friends and family for forgiveness, so too God.

Surely, the two out of four people here that are Jewish would have asked God for a good year ahead - whether they’re believers in God or not…

And to add a personal note, I’ve just come out of a long relationship, with someone whom I loved dearly, and thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with. His absence as my best friend, companion, confidante and partner has had a huge impact on my life; more than I thought it would. I feel in many ways like he has died, and that a piece of my heart died with him.

There are many forms and reasons for grief and loss, and everyone handles these acts differently. I hope we all have the strengths to get through them and see a brighter future and light at the end of the tunnel, however long it may take.

There are two people whom I know that are currently suffering from cancer and receiving treatment. No doubt there are more cases out there. My thoughts go out to these people, as well as their network of supporters. May God write you in the Book of Life this year; so too my two grandmothers who are in their elderly years.

So in reflection, I’ve just been wondering what’s going on in the world lately, with so many people leaving in such a short space of time. Of course this isn’t a new occurrence and people come and go all the time; I guess it’s just that this time, I know of these people… and it’s made me think…

Ps. On a happier note, I also know of several people who have recently had babies. Some of these children are back in hospital experiencing complications, others are at home May they all grow up to be big and strong, and lead healthy, happy, nurtured and long lives.

“God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.”